I finished painting the Henry A. Guerra, Jr Branch Library this morning. I think there are parts of it that may be some of my best work. Painting it back-lit turned out to be my favorite aspect of it. It’s a really cool building and I wish it was close enough to where I live to be my local branch. I still have a week before I leave for my meditation course so I may get another painting finished before I leave. In terms of my April deadline that would be a plus.
Henry A. Guerra Jr. Branch Library
I got a call from my brother as I was cleaning up my palette and the first thing he said was today is a dark day. I didn’t know what he was talking about but did a quick google search and discovered that Roe v. Wade has been overturned. What a sad day in America. I am crushed, more so for the young women and girls out there who’s lives will be negatively affected by this ruling.
Before Roe, the Church believed that life begins with the first breath, life begins outside the womb, but then they changed their definition to suit the new law. It’s hard to believe that control and sexism weren’t part of that decision. Part of me would like to go on a rant today, to express all my frustration and heartbreak, but I realize that there’s a tragedy bigger than the overturning of Roe v. Wade: It seems like righteous indignation is the only tool we use to live together.
Every time a law is passed that people don’t like the other side declares ‘war’ and spends time, energy, and resources fighting back. Fighting to defeat the ‘bad’ guys and their ‘bad’ agenda. We will never agree. I haven’t heard a single pro-life argument that I can respect. There’s no need to go over them. I, personally, don’t respect any of them. I understand people feel passionate about them, but that doesn’t mean they’re right.
And it doesn’t mean I’m right either.
Since I’m a 49 year-old woman, going through menopause as I write this, this doesn’t change much for me. I will not have to worry about needing an abortion. But I do worry about the women who will, the girls who will, the women and girls who will go to extremes to avoid being a mother against her will. A black market will develop for a service that has been provided for fifty years, a service that has proven to be needed by many, the reasons for which we have never cared to discover.
In all these years no one has had an interest in women who seek abortions. No one has tried to figure out how to eradicate the need in the first place. All they’ve done is fight - fight women, fight Planned Parenthood, fight the sinners. Now we will have an entire generation of unwanted, unplanned for children. Who will they grow up to be? Do we even care? Will we help them since we’re now forcing them to exist?
We don’t provide childcare. We don’t provide healthcare. We don’t provide maternity or paternity leave. We are a heartless society claiming to be moral. We punish each other for not being like us, for not thinking like us, for not making our lives easier. We are full of righteous indignation, full of pride and contempt. It’s exhausting living through this civil war.
I don’t want to fight. I don’t want to fight for the right to abortion. Soon we will disregard laws. Things like this ruling will create lawlessness because people are so tired of the crazed need for control over a society that’s too diverse to agree on anything. Something’s got to give. I hope we can stop this insanity. I hope we can learn to trust each other. I hope we can agree to live in a world we can’t control. I hope we can find some serenity and some inner peace. I hope we can stop looking ‘out there’ and fixating on all the things that offend us and outrage us.