Embracing the Dark

I finished the portrait of the dogs I started Tuesday. It didn’t take me long. I will sit with it over the weekend to make sure I’m satisfied before I contact the client, but I think it’s done. Later I’ll go take photos of the houses I’m painting so I can get them started even though the weather is dark and dreary. I don’t know if I should paint someone’s house on an overcast day. Would they like that? It’s a tough call. If the painting is done in the winter, or late fall, it would make sense. 

I’m feeling much better today. I got a good nights sleep last night and woke up feeling refreshed. I’m sitting with the front door open. It’s dark out but it’s nice. It’s humid, probably in the 70’s. I think it’s supposed to rain tonight. It feels like fall. It feels like Halloween, even though Halloween has come and gone. 

I was going to think of things I could do to get in the holiday spirit this year. I was burning a candle in the mornings but I seem to have forgotten lately. I guess it’s easier to remember when it’s cold. Not that I would ever pray for cold weather, but sometimes it’s nice. I like it just like this. Warm enough for a t-shirt but cool enough that I can have to door open.

People complain a lot about holiday decorations and music. I have been one of them. I want to know what the spirit of the holidays is about. I know the carols and the wreaths and all that. I know the gift giving, the trips to the mall, the ordering on-line. That all seems to be the spirit of commercialism and capitalism. But what’s the spirit of the holidays?

Why do we do this? Halloween was originally All Hallow’s Eve, or All Saints Day Eve. It marked the beginning of the winter season for the Celts of England and Ireland. They believed that those who had died returned to their homes, so the Celts built bonfires and dressed as their ancestors in order to help lead the way. Then, on the third day, they celebrated All Soul’s Day. 

Like a lot of people Halloween is my favorite holiday, but it too has been turned into something that hardly feels special. It’s all about dressing provocatively and shockingly as opposed to dressing as an alter-ego or an ancestor. People don’t seem to dig deep in order to express something personal. It doesn’t seem like we dig deep for anything these days. It’s too painful for most people.

Thanksgiving was a celebration between the Pilgrims and Wampanoag after the Pilgrim’s first successful harvest. There’s something about the celebration of harvest that warms me. It was a celebration of success, of the grueling journey that is tilling the soil, planting seeds, and nurturing a crop of food that will sustain the life of an individual, family, and community. That seems like something to celebrate.

And Christmas originated as both a Roman and Pagan celebration. They celebrated Saturn, who was seen as the God of agriculture, and the birth of Mithra, the Sun God. The sun vanishes in the Northern hemisphere for three days before it begins to rise again, signifying a new beginning. That definitely seems like something to honor with a celebration. 

I guess I’d like to honor the changing of the seasons, the dying leaves, and the shorter days, the overcast skies. I’d like to celebrate the darkness, especially the warmth we create to help get us through. There’s something equally eerie and intriguing about the dark. As a young adult I was drawn to melancholy music and movies. I was trying to get used to pain and suffering and that helped. Maybe that’s how I’ll get in the holiday spirit. Maybe I need some Vince Guaraldi Trio and some Film Noir.